Time is of the Essence

Never underappreciate time spent with loved ones. It can heal the soul, bring peace to the mind, make your heart cheerful, and bring a smile to your face. If that quality time is spent playing video games, its even better. One person close to me doesn't enjoy video games though, but that person is my best friend, so it doesn't matter. Movies or just about anything is fun with him, as long as we do it together, it doesn't really matter what we do. Most of all I like to talk though I think. I love my best friend to death (if you didn't know that by now, you haven't been comprehending anything) but he always wants to be doing something, always wants to be busy. Which is fine, I like doing things like watching movies and playing games and all of that is good fun. But sometimes I would just prefer to talk, just sit and talk and enjoy each other's company. When we aren't together, we talk all the time. But when we are together, we hardly ever do. "Talk is cheap and time is money." Not everything is about money, time is something much more valuable than money, and talk isn't cheap, its something I treasure. Every word told to me I keep in my heart and appreciate. Countless conversations I am able to run through my head again because I have them memorized (when you have a memory as sharp as mine, that isn't too difficult) and whenever I feel a little sad or scared, I think of them and they make me feel better. There is one thing that will cause me to be upset quicker than anything, and that is when someone messes with my family. My best friend is a part of my family, because he is so close and important to me. So I'm not leaving anyone out when I say that I protect my family, or at least that I want to protect them. I can't be everywhere at once, so I can't always make sure that they are all safe. But I certainly would like to.

I'm not sure if this is how it is with everyone or not, but when someone is really important to me, I want to tell them. I want them to know exactly how I feel. But it seems like the words I pick are never good enough. When I try to explain how I feel, it doesn't seem like the other person gets exactly how important they are. I get really frustrated sometimes, because I really want them to know and they don't and then I blame myself so I keep trying to tell them but I never feel like I do a good enough job and I never feel that I tell them enough how much I care about them.

I always feel guilty when I don't answer my friends back right away. They tell me things because they want me to know and they want to know what I think. So it makes me feel really bad when I don't answer back soon. I have spent hours on the computer and gotten in trouble many times because I have to make sure that nothing important is told to me and I miss it. It doesn't even have to be something important, it could be something like "Hey, whats going on" and I would feel bad about not answering because they obviously wanted to talk and they probably actually care about what I am doing since they asked and I should answer them right away so they know that I'm not ignoring them or anything. I feel like its never the other person's fault if they don't answer me right away, maybe they just got busy or maybe I said something wrong or maybe I didn't answer in time. But I feel like it is always my fault if I don't answer, because I should always be there for them no matter what. That's just the way my mind works.
PrincessC