Secrets, Decisions

Life is full of decisions, that's something that they tell you when you are very young. You decide what you eat, what you wear, what you do, and what you don't. As you get older, you get more chances to choice. And also more chances to mess things up. Society has also changed as it has gotten older. It seems to me that the smarter we get, the stupider we get. We have high-definition television (smart, technologically advanced) that shows bad programming (less than intelligent). We are teaching the younger generations things that we didn't know at that age, we are causing them to lose their innocence earlier. But we don't seem to even care. Music, we have the ability to carry thousands of songs in our pockets, in something the same width as a pencil (smart) but the things that we listen to on those devices, the songs that we program into those devices (less than smart). If there is one thing in this world that you want to daily struggle to keep right, its your witness. How you appear to people needs to match with what you say.

I have a secret love. Country music. I'm not sure why, I used to tell people that I didn't like it, but I always really have. There is just something so...reminiscent about it. Its what my grandparents always listened to. I miss that time, those times when I would go over there, they were always so proud of me. We would always do jigsaw puzzles together, and I would always get upset because my grandfather wouldn't do it right, but he would always try to help. Things were so simple and peaceful and nice over there. Things could be so bad and then instantly better as soon as I entered that house. Once, it was the middle of a bad storm, but I wasn't worried at all, because nothing could go wrong when I was in that house with those people. I suppose that is what I am searching for now, looking for that peaceful place and happiness again. I'm not sure where or when I'll find it, but I'm not going to stop searching until I find it.

There is something else about country music too. The bus, the big yellow school bus. Back before I had any shame, I would always sing on the bus, sing along to the radio, which was always country music. I remember that I wouldn't always know the words, but it was country music which only has basically three themes, my woman loves me, my woman left me, and beer, so making up words isn't too difficult. No one ever seemed to notice, or they just didn't say anything. I hear rumors that I have a pretty nice singing voice, so maybe they just enjoyed listening.

I think that is probably enough reminiscing for one night.
Later,
PrincessC