Saturday, January 15, 2011

Losing

Losing is not fun. Losing a contest that you worked really hard at entering for makes you feel very sad. But losing a person that you care about is even worse. I am fairly certain that I am going to lose my best friend, and I fear that it may be soon. I don't think that I will lose him because of death, though that is a very sad way to lose someone. But I think that someone will come along that is more important than me. Someone will come that will give him what I can't: a relationship, a romantic relationship. I know that is what he wants. And mostly, I wish so terribly that I could give it to him. Yet at the same time, part of me, the part that is arguably selfish, doesn't want him to have one, because I know that means that I will no longer be important. At least, I won't be as important to him, he won't be able to email me all the time, tell me he loves me all the time, want to randomly go places with me, or watch movies during which I basically crawl up in his lap. And what would happen if something happened between them, and they were no longer together? That would make my amigo become very sad, and I wouldn't know how to help him and make it better. I suppose that I would just have to be there for him, and I would, always, be there for him, but I would so much hate to see him be sad.

Losing your voice is pretty sad too. I always seem to lose mine the week of singing contest, and it always very much makes me nervous, but then somehow I am able to regain it before its time. Losing your hair is pretty sad, if you go bald.

PrincessC

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